I don't know if I'll ever conquer all of my fears. I have grundles of fears. ( Grundle...more than a bundle, and even more than a gross! Grundle.) I do understand that my fears reflect my life experiences. I've had ever so many life experiences. I generally prefer to focus on all of the grand ones, and I've had lots of those, but for the sake of this post I'm going to chat a bit about my fears, where they came from, and the attempts I've made to beat them back.
Darkness. A loving friend once told me by way of comfort, "There's nothing in the dark that isn't there in the light." GONG, NOPE...how is that comfort? I am completely and utterly aware that in the light there are plenty of things to cause fear. The biggest difference is that during the day you can SEE what you fear, and that takes away a little of the hair raising, goose bump creating, adrenaline pumping, fright.
Heights. I remember being very, very young, probably two or three and my six foot two Father swinging me up on his shoulders. He had a firm, safe, hold on me but I went wacky. I pulled at his hair, screamed, kicked, and cried until he put me down on terra firma. I can NOT ride in a lift chair at a ski resort. My feet simply can NOT dangle hundreds of feet in the air with nothing underneath. I can do slightly better in a tram, but NOT if the floor consists of see through anything. I see no powerful reason to face this fear. Maybe someday when I want to encourage grandkids to face their fears.
Choking. I was born allergic to this world. Seriously, I have had many, MANY allergy tests performed. I react to every substance. I've had allergy shots three or four times in my life. They HAVE helped, but I still remain very allergic. I never know what substance I'm going to react to. Choking happens less than it used to. HOORAY! I just never know when it will happen. Sitting in a very sacred worship service, suddenly I feel my throat swelling, my air passages narrowing. I can't just stand up and retreat. Fortunately, I almost always carry a lozenge of some type with me. (I have to even be careful what type of lozenge. If they have honey, sometimes the honey pollens make me react!) The lozenge tends to beat back the swelling.
Dentists. My teeth are almost gone, and I'm just fifty-eight. It happened by a combination of factors like illness, car accidents, etc. etc. I've been through root canals, crowns, cavities, fractured teeth, many, many other dental horrors. I can NOT sit calmly in a dentist chair and let them work on me. I can only be worked on through the use of Nitrous Oxide/Laughing Gas. It doesn't make me laugh but it takes the fear firmly away.
That is enough of fear. Just by relating those fears I feel my heart pumping harder, and my adrenaline beginning to ramp up. I speak of them only to express the difference between living with fear firmly in control, or living with FAITH in control. For those who do not believe in any sort of religion, or God inspired ideas let me bring in common ideas. Faith is NOT just about God, or religion. It takes faith to go to sleep at night. Faith to wake up and live. Faith to have a family. Faith to work at a job. We need faith in ourselves to achieve, and grow. Faith is a living, vital power. Not simply "The evidence of things unseen..."
I love the quote that says, "Never take advice from your fears." NEVER! Stop and think of the profundity of that quote. It doesn't imply SOMETIMES, any period of time, allowing fear to control your life choices. IS THAT POSSIBLE? Can we literally, actually NEVER allow fear to tell us how to live life? Please understand I am NOT suggesting that you immediately sign up to jump from a plane, or climb a rock face on a mountain. There are many more simple ways to fight fear.
What would that mean in your world? For me it would mean not watching murder mysteries before bed! lol That's a simple fix for my intense fear of the dark. In the hour before I retire to sleep I need to fill my mind with thoughts of power, and inspiration. I need to focus on Ideas that elevate, and bring me into my strongest self.
How do we do that? Beat fear with faith? Is it even possible? I am all too human. I DON'T always manage. Yet reaching for the brightest within myself, the strongest possible self is the grandest adventure of life.
Let me re-state that. When you think of an adventure how do you define it? Do the characters in pirate movies have adventures? Do you think of swashbuckling with a sharp, bright sword your fears away. That is an excellent image. Using something powerful and sharp to slash those fears away!
Adventure? Robert Louis Stevenson (one of my favorite writers and humans), wrote "Treasure Island," before he ever saw an island. He wrote of those adventures from his sick bed. He was born with severe allergy asthma. That was a terminal diagnosis at that time. There wasn't even canned oxygen to give him when he would struggle (yes, and choke) for oxygen. Yet he had a grand adventure...IN HIS MIND!
Is that possible? I validate that YES it is! I wrote my books for years from my bed. As a small child, ill most of the time, no worthwhile children's daytime television, and not old enough to read, I would write stories in my mind. Those early childhood ideas cogitated for over forty years before I began to put them on paper.
When I would make up strong, valiant, people in my mind I would also strengthen myself. I would face my fears instead of letting THEM face me!
YES...I have lots and lots of fears. Yet I am aware that it IS possible to face them. I like to envision myself sticking my tongue out and stamping my foot and saying, "I AM stronger than you!" I do not wish to give another minute of my life away to being ruled by fear.
Today, find a fear moment, and conquer it! Build some mental armor. Helmet, a quote that inspires you, breastplate, a friend who helps you to be your best, lower part of the armor (Can't remember the name), prayers or meditation, Shield, a physical activity that creates endorphins (dancing for me, or water aerobics). In your mind, put on that armor and FACE YOUR FEAR! You may be surprised by how empowering this small activity can be in your life.