I'm sitting in the semi-darkness. My Valentine's Tree (aka as my Christmas tree) lights are blinking softly, lighting my heart. Every ornament on this tree has a story, and every decoration
connects me to my sweetheart Nyle.
I don't remember our last Valentine's Day together, last year. It bothers me that I can't remember but what I DO remember is how special Nyle made EVERYDAY that we were together. He had such a joyeux de vivre. The worst times were made better by his ability to be silly, to goof, to joke, but most especially to love.
I'm ever so grateful for the gift that he left behind for me...our two daughters. They watch over me with care and patience. It's an early role reversal. I expected eventually for our daughters to reach out to take care of me when I became old and possibly feeble, more fragile. I NEVER planned on their having to take care of me before I even reached the generally accepted age of seniorhood sixty.
Yet they give, serve, and love with such seeming ease that sometimes I forget to notice that I AM being served. All through their young lives they have taught me about so many things. Now they teach me about dealing with grief by serving others.
Valentine's Day can be a difficult time for those who have not had the chance for romance, or those that face divorce, or death. Yet I have found great joy this year, even as I fight great sorrow....through the loving gifts given to our family from others.
So....I miss Nyle with every breath that I breathe, but I am thankful for the years we spent together. I WILL overcome my anguish by following Nyle and our daughters example of service.